Parenting · Story time

Story time – My first labour and birth experience. 

So I’ve wanted to write about my experience when I went into labour and gave birth to my first duaghter, khaleesi, for a while now. I’ve been putting it off as it really is a long post, especially if everyone wants me to include as much detail as possible. I think I’m finally feeling ready to write about it, purely because I’m laying in a relaxing hot bath by myself whilst khaleesi is curled up downstairs with her daddy, so really, I’m writing it because I finally have some spare time to put in the effort. 

I also have spoke about my birth with khaleesi a lot in previous posts, but without actually writing the full birth story, so therefore when I refer to how ‘terrible’ my labour was, nobody really understands why, so hopefully this will clear that up for everyone. 

I absolutely have to write a short disclaimer. First of all, I know some people will read this and think my experience wasn’t as bad, especially if yours was a lot worse than mine, I’m in no way trying to say my labour was the worst in the world, but for me, someone who copes with pain pretty well, I struggled massively and for me it wasn’t the nice experience I imagined. Secondly, if your not into Gory details then just stop reading now, this post, and I pre-warn you, is a bit TMI, like I said, I won’t be leaving out any details, so I’m going to tell you all exactly how it happened. 

So you’ve been warned, if you don’t deal with TMI then just stop reading, don’t say I didn’t warn you! 

I woke up on the 22nd June 2015 and realised I had lost my mucous plug. Gross, I know. If you don’t know what this is, then it’s a layer of discharge that protects your baby from infection throughout your pregnancy by protecting your cervix and usually it has blood in it. So yeah, I had that and it definitely was my mucous plug, no doubt about it. I told my mum who was at work at the time and she got excited, saying that would most likely mean that khaleesi would arrive within 48 hours! I didn’t get excited though, because I have known of and read about women who lost their mucous plug but still didn’t go into labor until around 3 weeks later! So really, having that happen wasn’t making me feel any closer to having her. I was 38 weeks and 3 days pregnant when I lost my mucous plug. 

My bump had dropped massively, my belly was so big it was virtually see-through, I had not a stretch mark in sight apart from 2 that was from my hip piercings having stretched. I felt heavy, breathless and I was so ready for labour. I wanted this baby out now, I had completely had enough. 

That night I went to bed quite late, having waited all day for a sign that labour may be starting, but absolutely nothing happened and I was feeling completely impatient and very disheartened. I climbed into bed gone 12am, so it was now June 23rd. 

At 12:50am I had my first contraction. It wasn’t bad, very mild in fact, almost like a period cramp, and I also had quite dull aching pains in my lower back and tail bone. After getting a couple of these I knew I should start timing them, so I did, and they were only 10 minutes apart, but they were regular. I didn’t tell Nathan at this point, he was asleep and it wasn’t necessary for me to tell anybody as they weren’t closer together yet. By 4am however, they were beginning to get pretty painful, my tail bone felt like it was shattering every time I got a contraction and my lower back was on agony every time my stomach tightened up. This is how I knew instantly that I had the dreaded back labour along with normal contractions. I woke my mum and Nathan up, as we were living with my mum at the time. I walked into mums room and told her I was having contractions. She asked if I had timed them and I said yeah, I have been for hours and they are 3 minutes apart. I then had another contraction and she jumped straight out of bed and came over to me, she knew it was happening and wasn’t a false alarm, it was bloody painful. We all went downstairs and I rang labour ward, they timed my next contraction over the phone but because it was 3 minutes and 20 seconds from the previous one, they told me to wait it out even longer and not to bother going up there yet. I was getting irritated, I was in pain and had been for a while and my contractions were so intense! 

Nathan went back to bed to get some more sleep as we knew it would probably be a long day ahead, my mum made coffee and began tidying the house like a mad women in preparation for baby. Please note that she had already bloody tidied the place like 5 times that week! Bless her heart. She rang my Nan too and I never really swear in front of my Nan, but my contractions were now 2 minutes apart and were very regular, I was barely getting much of a breather break and by this point I was virtually climbing the walls, oh and swearing!! My Nan could hear me over the phone and bless her, she ignored my foul language and told mum that she remembers that feeling! It got unbearable, I needed some pain relief or at least to be checked, I didn’t even know if I had dilated! My mum rang the ward again and said she was bringing me up. They wasn’t happy, they said ‘no one labours this quickly with their first baby, just wait it out at home’ my mum got angry, ‘all the women in my family have had their first babies in less than 2 hours, we are bringing her in!’ 

We then left to go to the hospital, Nathan driving and me trying to control my contractions in the back of the car. They were so painful! I just wanted to move around but being strapped in the back was making me so uncomfortable! And it was still a 20 minute drive to the hospital! 

When we got there I was struggling to walk, i was coping but my tail bone was absolutely agonising! Every contraction was making me feel like my lower back and tail bone was breaking!! 

I got into the ward and they checked me, I was 3cm. Not a great start and they told me I wasn’t even in established labour yet and wasn’t considered as in established labour until I had reached 4cm. So she put me on a ward with 3 other women and refused me any form of pain relief. I was getting pretty angry, was struggling to keep quiet whenever a contraction came on and in all honesty, I didn’t understand at all how I would get through the rest of labour if this was me at only 3cm! 

I was in an awful lot of pain, I couldn’t breath through my contractions easily and they were getting pretty close together. Around 1 minute apart now and lasting ages! I asked if I could have a bath, as I was refused any other pain relief, including gas and air which I begged for! Reluctantly, they agreed and ran me a bath. 

I got in it and within only 5 minutes I couldn’t bare it any longer, I was screaming and yelling in agony, I needed pain relief, the contractions were now coming so thick and fast I barely had time to sort myself out between them. They must have been only 30 seconds apart by this point. I managed to get my t shirt back on and ended up running to the toilet because I had this strong urge to push and had no bed to go to.

I sat on the toilet, let at a yell and told the midwife I was pushing. They tutted at me and made me feel so worthless. They told me I was over reacting and I wouldn’t have dilated anymore that quickly! My mum bless her, was so angry, explaining to and shouting at them that quick labours run in the family and can they not give me anything for the pain?! 

I then said I was definitely pushing and I began to push without them. They then panicked, well one midwife did, the rest sat at their desks drinking coffee like I was irritating. My mum nearly threw a coffee cup at them! I was still pushing and mum panicked and told me to stop. The midwife pushed Nathan and my mum out of the toilet and closed the door, meaning if I gave birth then Nathan would miss it! 

She looked at me, and promised me that she would check me if I got myself to the ward bed. So when my contraction stopped, I speed walked to the bed and within seconds had another contraction. I couldn’t help but yell, all the mothers around me in the ward must have been horrified! The midwife checked me and I was fucking 9cm! I had gone from 3 to 9 in literally only the space of an hour or so. 

She then told me I needed to go to the delivery room. I didn’t want to be pushed there in a wheelchair, so I ran there by myself. I must have looked hilarious, but I was in too much pain to give a crap! The second I stepped in there I begged for an epidural, they refused. I then begged for gas and air, they refused. All of a sudden, I had an immense amount of pressure down below and needed to push, but before I could think my waters broke. No, tell a lie, they exploded. Literally like a water balloon! They broke everywhere, and my poor mum had it on her feet!

My mum and Nathan then lifted me on the bed and I began to push. Within only about 15 seconds, khaleesi was born, weighing bang on 7lbs and was absolutely perfect, extremely healthy and had a apdar score of straight 10’s! My mum cut the chord because Nathan couldn’t do it bless him and then they handed her to Nathan who snuggled her and gave her a bottle. I then got told I needed stitches and that I was losing a lot of blood because my uterus wasn’t clotting the blood itself. So they injected my leg with something and then called the head midwife in to come and massage my belly. She was literally needing it like she was making bread from dough to try and get my stomach to clot up as I was close to hemmoraghing. Luckily, I didn’t and was fine to stay in the delivery room. They then offered me gas and air whilst they stitched me up. Cheeky bastards, a bit bloody late for that now! 

Anyway, within a few hours my energy had returned and I felt a bit better, mum helped me get dressed and I managed to hold khaleesi whilst Nathan wheeled me to the ward. I was so happy to have finally had her! 
– so yes, my birth and labour was very fast, completely uncontrollable and had horrible and unsympathetic midwives that really didn’t do much at all, I practically did it all by myself. And as for pain relief, I had always wished on giving birth without any, but when it came down to it I begged for any pain relief I could get, but to be even refused gas and air was a joke, so I ended up doing the lot 100% natural and it was so painful!

However, here I am 32 weeks and 1 day pregnant, preparing to do it all over again, which I’m honestly petrified of. Luckily this time round I have a consultant on my side who is going to try and ensure I get better care and have the birth I so desperately desire!

So wish me luck everyone, because I definitely need it. And I’m certain this baby will come a lot quicker than khaleesi did, which is scary. 

I will update you all with my second labour and birth experience once second baby is here and I just hope it’s a lot more calmer and a lot nicer than my first labour and birth experience!

Talk again soon 👄 

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